It wasn’t everything I owned, but it was everything I thought I needed, packed into two suitcases. One neon green, the other fuchsia pink, I kept them as close as possible in my own little corner of the airport arrivals, fiddling with the unfamiliar Albertan address. Somehow I’d gotten the dates mixed up, and had arrived a day early, but…
Yes, this is personal. No, it’s not just about me. 1. My Smile isn’t everything Yes, some days, things are wonderful. I’m tired, but I’m happy… so very happy, and my heart is full. Those are the days that you see me, and I go to church, I take a walk, I stop by and say, ‘hello’. But those days…
I know what you’re thinking. It’s about time. I mean, seriously, it’s been five weeks already… But Guys, this is a Big Deal. I’ve progressively become more introverted since my college days, so I’m already more content to stay at home on the acreage by myself with our daughter, rather than make trips to town every day. And in my…
When you raise your daughter away from family, you’re suddenly reminded of how far away the distance is. A plane ride is no longer “just a plane ride”, and six months is no longer “just six months”. When you raise your daughter away from family, you take advantage of the family you do have. Dinner with in-laws become intentional, and…
For years, I was determined that I would never become a teacher. Most likely, in my childish way, because so many people said that’s what I should do. And it made sense. I spent my Saturdays teaching teddy bears the alphabet on an old chalkboard… I clipped the corners of my Math books and gave a giant, flourishing checkmark… and…
Yesterday. Yesterday, as my childhood hero Anne Shirley would say, was my proverbial Jonah Day. Yesterday, the sunshine made me feel empty. The clouds were moving past me. The moments were evading me. Yesterday my morning coffee tasted bitter. It didn’t matter that I was able to sleep in until the sunrise. It wasn’t satisfying. Yesterday I was disgusted with…
Admittedly, I’ve never been a huge fan of Mary. I have nothing against her specifically, but after 25 + years of hearing the Christmas story each December, I think my heart grew numb to her role in bringing our Emmanuel into the world. The verses in the gospel of Luke just seem to roll over the tongue in oh-so-familiar tones,…
It’s taken me a long time to say those words. Even now, they start to make me shiver a little, just thinking those thoughts. Am I ready for this? My journals for the last 15 years are full of so many hopes and dreams, but they’re fluffed up in between the multiple fears that I’ve had while going through different…
I’m tired. Am I allowed to say that? It’s now been three months since I’ve been back at the front of the classroom, and I think I’m finally starting to settle into things. But after a week’s visit to see family in Ontario, we returned home to a grey, cold, snowy, day… and I felt so very, very tired. And…
And I have no idea how to deal with it. Because this isn’t the kind of season where you can see it in the forecast, or mark the calendar with the changing colours… It’s invisible. Hidden. Secret. Unimportant. At least, to everyone but us.