In the Essence of Time For All that Is Complex

“Time” is really starting to confuse me.

I’m not sure if it’s a product of aging, becoming a mother, or of stepping outside the traditional workforce with regular routine and organized schedules…

But it’s messing with me.

Am I alone in this?

I’m pretty sure my baby girl was just born yesterday, but she’s pulling herself up onto couches, and babbling a mile a minute. I feel like I’ve been packing forever, but we’ve been settled into our temporary basement suite for just over a week. I keep expecting our pup to be acting like an “adult” by now, but he just destroyed the straps on the stroller. I only began the laundry as soon as nap time started, but I’ve already got 3 piles to fold, and a cry coming from the bedroom.

I honestly can’t figure out if I’m being productive, or if I’m letting the days slip by with a list I’ve made, checked twice, and still can’t seem to cross anything off.

I’ve read about the Vikings (I should have been cleaning the bathroom), and how they “discovered” Iceland by ignoring the presence of Irish monks.

I’ve re-organized my pinterest board (I should have been packing the last boxes), and the addiction has taken over my evenings.

I’ve got “Friends” on in the background (I should have been cleaning out the fridge), and I’m still laughing at Chandler’s 90’s humour.

I’ve been Christmas shopping online (I should have been calling my mom), and Etsy is now a permanent tab on my computer.

I’ve become obsessed with all things “hygge” (I should have been making supper), and now I’ve added yet another pinterest board.

I’ve made a dozen random lists (I should have been crossing things off), and now I can’t keep all of them separate.

What did I do today?

When is it bedtime?

Can you see how fast she’s growing?

How does Daylight Savings Time factor into this?

Have you seen my coffee?

Is there going to be a test?

It’s completely, absolutely, messing with me, and I can’t tell if it’s going too fast, or too slow, or if I’m possibly maybe starting to repeat myself.

So, I think it’s time to get intentional – to choose the time that flies, and the time that stops, savouring the flavours and learning the lessons, so that I’m not waiting for the seasons to change while the hours go quickly by. I’m going to do “all the things” that give “all the feels”, and take dozens of snap shots while I work towards the Greater Things of Life and Be Specific With My Words: He loves me. I am His. I am Created to Create. Life is Hard, but also Beautiful. Speak to Him. Listen to Him. Rest in Truth and in Peace. I am Home.

Breathe. And now Step. And Climb Higher.

I’m still not sure if it’s Monday or Tuesday, but tomorrow is Nap Time, and before I know it, it’ll be Last Year’s Christmas (that sounds familiar)…

So I’m going to go bake cookies (when I should do the laundry), and sit down with my family (I don’t know where I left the vacuum) while the candle flickers (the dog runs off to chase the neighbour’s truck) and thank God for Choosing Life (…and get a calendar).

His plans and intentions are the only ones that matter, and It All is in His Time. Amen.

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1 thought on “In the Essence of Time For All that Is Complex

  1. My brother who has a wise soul doesn’t have a to-do list – he has a what I did list – he says that’s the one that matters most. As his older (and only) sibling this is a new thought for me. I’m a goal setter and checker. And sometimes those goals rule me to the point I get nothing done – not even them as I avoid them like they are the enemy of my soul. And maybe sometimes they are! I might give his way a chance. While I sit a little longer with my dogs and coffee pondering.

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