When You Raise Your Daughter Away From Family

When you raise your daughter away from family, you’re suddenly reminded of how far away the distance is. A plane ride is no longer “just a plane ride”, and six months is no longer “just six months”. When you raise your daughter away from family, you take advantage of the family you do have. Dinner with in-laws become intentional, and…

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I’m a Classroom Teacher, But It’s Not the Desire of My Heart

For years, I was determined that I would never become a teacher. Most likely, in my childish way, because so many people said that’s what I should do. And it made sense. I spent my Saturdays teaching teddy bears the alphabet on an old chalkboard… I clipped the corners of my Math books  and gave a giant, flourishing checkmark… and…

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Yesterday (The Perfect Word)

Yesterday. Yesterday, as my childhood hero Anne Shirley would say, was my proverbial Jonah Day. Yesterday, the sunshine made me feel empty. The clouds were moving past me. The moments were evading me. Yesterday my morning coffee tasted bitter. It didn’t matter that I was able to sleep in until the sunrise. It wasn’t satisfying. Yesterday I was disgusted with…

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This Mary Moment

Admittedly, I’ve never been a huge fan of Mary. I have nothing against her specifically, but after 25 + years of hearing the Christmas story each December, I think my heart grew numb to her role in bringing our Emmanuel into the world. The verses in the gospel of Luke just seem to roll over the tongue in oh-so-familiar tones,…

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I Thank God For Fear

It’s taken me a long time to say those words. Even now, they start to make me shiver a little, just thinking those thoughts. Am I ready for this? My journals for the last 15 years are full of so many hopes and dreams, but they’re fluffed up in between the multiple fears that I’ve had while going through different…

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The Picture of November Grey

I’m tired. Am I allowed to say that? It’s now been three months since I’ve been back at the front of the classroom, and I think I’m finally starting to settle into things. But after a week’s visit to see family in Ontario, we returned home to a grey, cold, snowy, day… and I felt so very, very tired. And…

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I’m in an unfamiliar season…

And I have no idea how to deal with it. Because this isn’t the kind of season where you can see it in the forecast, or mark the calendar with the changing colours… It’s invisible. Hidden. Secret. Unimportant. At least, to everyone but us.

Let’s Move Mountains

“If you have faith, you can move mountains.” But when mountains move, it’s not magic. No abracadabra, snap once, POOF. Applause. …There’s  crumbling, cracking, grumbling, moaning. There are fault lines and avalanches, earthquakes and falling rocks. It’s long. Sometimes Painful. Yet miraculous. A New Birth.

The Letter

May 23, 2016 Dear Seventeen, Ten Years. It’s been Ten Years since you wrote that letter, and stuffed it in an envelope labeled “Lisa Kaastra: Age 27”. Ten Years? I can’t help but laugh a little at you, Seventeen. You were silly. But in a fun, naïve, adventurous kind of way. You asked, “Does the year of twenty-seven have all…

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The Truth About Spilled Milk

Predictably, about once a month I wake up and wonder if the progress I think I’ve made, is actually making progress at all. It’s like one of those “the more you know, the more you know you don’t know” moments – With Life. With Faith. With Dreams. Overwhelmed, all I want to do is just curl up in the fetal…

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